January 3rd. This date has a couple of meanings. First my grandfather passed away 4 years ago today, my estimated due date for my second pregnancy is today, I would of had a one year old, and the start of my first IVF cycle is today.
Today is the first day of my cycle. My last birth control pill was on the 30th. They say to expect AF to come 3 to 5 days after. It was right on schedule. I go in tomorrow for blood work and ultrasound and then they will call me and tell me what to decrease and what medications to start. We are going to be our way. I feel good about this cycle. This date has always had meaning to me and I would like to think this is a sign that all is going to be ok.
You have to have faith through all this. Its the only thing that keeps you sane. Although through this journey I have had faith and things still went wrong, I still try to hold on to it.
It might be silly for some and many people may choose not to believe it, but would like to think of it this way. I would like to think that my grandfather is up there holding my baby angel and will make this cycle work.
I feel he is telling me, "it will all be alright Suzanne, we will make this happen."